The notion that writers spend their days leisurely in pajamas, sipping lattes while joyfully typing away is a charming thought, but the reality is quite different.
In truth, many of us juggle full or part-time jobs alongside our writing endeavours. Making a sustainable living as an author is challenging, often requiring multiple books or a blockbuster debut — which is rare (although I do hope ‘Sinful Basket’ will be a hit).
Balancing writing with an eight-hour workday, not to mention family commitments, self-care, exercise, blogging, and travel, poses a considerable challenge. While it’s tempting to think, “I’ll fit in my writing whenever I can,” I’ve found that this mindset often relegates writing to the background.
Personally, I prioritize routine, strategically allocating time to maximize productivity and planning ahead to ensure optimal use of every moment.
#1 – PROTECT YOUR WRITING TIME.
Many find it odd and inconvenient that my workday extends beyond the typical end time. This occasionally leads to missing out on social events or opportunities. However, if I make my writing easily reschedulable, it could establish a precedent for frequent rescheduling.
#2 – SET GOALS AND DEADLINES.
Think of them as your new best friend and your worst enemy at the same time. They are so helpful to achieving your writing dreams because they allow accountability and tracking milestones.
I would advice writing them down and pasting them somewhere you can see them. These goals could be number of words per day, the type of content you would like to write on certain days or writing deadlines that you have, including submissions.
#3 – COMMIT!
It only takes 21 days to form a habit, but you gotta stick with it! I know it is hard breaking down old habits of procrastination, but having the right motivations and mindset will help tremendously! If you can track milestones, or have an accountability chart, you do that.
#4 – BUT DON’T BE TOO HARD ON YOURSELF.
Ultimately, things happens. Illness, work deadlines, dead computers, seasonal depression,just life. So give yourself a little grace – especially in the beginning – to adjust and do what’s best for your life. Writing is not a chore, it should be an extension of who you are.
Good luck to all the writers out there and you continue to bring stories into the light and make true your literary dreams!
With love,
The dreams that belong to the multi coloured girl🫀
I have been playing journalist lately, or columnist more like. I have been writing for The Weekend Nation, every weekend as the name stipulates and it has kept me…writing. Something I have been having a pretty hard time with even though it has always come so easily to me. I have had my ups and down like everyone else and I am currently still sorting through the mess that was the last four weeks but life has been great overall.
Like I said, the universe has a tendency of meeting me as far as I meet myself and even though that hasn’t been very far out, my cup has not run empty. I am still grateful for the opportunities that continue to arise and the challenges I move past; and for the opportunities I did not have the courage to face, tizakumanaso. It just wasn’t the right time for me.
What’s new? First, I am a dog mummy! Yes, I am having the time of my life adjusting to having someone to attend to; feed, bathe and take care of. He is so noisy and very energetic, and why is he always hungry? Nonetheless, the company has been good for your favourite bachelorette and the company goes by the name of Coh. (Please, don’t bother asking what it means and no, it is not short for Kondwani.)
I am back to content creation on my YouTube channel and I am dedicated to uploading videos weekly (fingers and toes crossed) . I have been actively working towards making videos and I am relearning the processes with feedback from all the viewers of course (eggs and omelettes). Please do subscribe! And I will see you every Sunday!
I would have loved to do a life audit in this post but I will save you the hustle by making a separate post.
December is days away and I am scared that I will not be able to meet all my goals even though I have made such significant progress in all of them (or Atleast made steps towards them.) Anyways, that does not take away the fact that there are some short term goals that may correlate to the original goals that I can tick off before the big 2023 finals. Let us get into the personal goals before 2024:
1. Donate blood again.
2. Donate 90% of my closet (I have already sorted through my clothes and if you would like to donate yours too, send me an email myraokumu@gmail.com or comment below!)
3. Organise a sanitary products drive! (If you would like to a part of this, please let me know!)
4. Be patient and more appreciative of myself! (I deserve the soft and gentle side of myself)
6. Write weekly articles, blogs, stories and essays! (One piece a day keeps the thoughts away.)
7. Learn a new language with Duo Lingo (Settled on Swahili and Arabic)
8. Get a funeral policy!
9. Complete a 30 day challenge (could be anything right? Any suggestions?)
10. A solo staycation🧘🏾♀️
I was going for ‘more collaborations’ as one of my end goals but I have put a brake on that one for now. Instead of set goals, I have put more focus on creating systems that work towards the goal, if that makes any sense. Dividing my goals into tasks and setting milestones, eases up the pressure for me to reach the end and also allows for accountability along the way.
2023 has been…something, to say the least and this year has not turned out as I initially thought it would. Remember the beginning of the legacy, we are nearing the end of the beginning and I guess things can only get better from here.
I haven’t been okay, lately. I am one to admit my humanity in times like this because I do not have unrealistic expectations of myself. Good news, I am doing so much better and you will be seeing more of my writings now as I transition into a space that allows for me to breathe, live and focus on my well being. It has been lovely and therapeutic writing again, I absolutely missed this.
That is all I had to say, subscribe to my blog and my YouTube channel and let’s stay connected!
I have had a terrible week and I really want to talk about it, why not blog about it?
It started with constant sadness and absent mindedness, the usual PMS symptoms but without the MS. I swear for a second there I thought I was going crazy and losing my mind. Please, don’t get me wrong. I have a lot of things to be thankful for, things to look forward to, and I am surrounded by people with good intentions and support system that never fails.
What more would a girl ask for, you would ask.
And the answer is “I don’t know.” I should be grateful for the amazing job I have, for the friends I have, for the love that surrounds me, for the support I get, for this life I have made for myself, for the chance I get everyday to be a better person, for the things that continuously align in my favour, and countless other things!
I am drowning in my own head at this point and it is safe to say, sanity has vacated the building and recommended me to the nearest shrink.
How do I break this cycle?
What am I doing wrong or different?
What is misaligning my life?
I usually have everything dotted and crossed, organised in files and written down. Right now, I don’t. I am free styling and it is going terribly.
I could cry, but that would mean dedicating time and effort to that and I am not in the mood.
(Takes a deep breath)
It escalated into isolation, brooding, and avoidance. I should have said something, sure, but how do you explain a problem that has no plausible explanation or cause? How do you say ‘I am not okay’ when everything is okay? Just how.
I am so tired of not being 100% in my own life. Of not showing up for myself and for people in the ways I ought to, and I am so tired of holding myself hostage in this situation. Simple, mundane tasks I can complete in minutes being dragged through days, lack of organisation and focus; all that is not me.
I am human, I am allowed bad days.
But I choose (from tomorrow, because today went to waste) to be intentional.
I choose to be intentional about doing right by myself and celebrating myself for being me. Not cause I have achieved something.I will remind myself that even on the days I do not do anything that is praiseworthy, I am still an incredible human with amazing potential and qualities.
I will not take love away from myself or deny myself good things because I did not live to a certain expectation. I will applaud myself for being present each day and show myself compassion on the days when nothing makes sense.
I have to be intentional about breaking some patterns that I have noticed in myself . The procrastination? In the bin. The lack of focus, the anxiety over mundane tasks, the lack of writing, the constant excuses, unnecessary distractions? All of it, everything goes in the dumpster or incinerator. Whichever one is more permanent.Nothing changes until I change.I have to choose to change.
I have to be Intentional about my goals and your vision or I will be manifesting and sabaweling forever. My intentions and my actions should align. The choices I make for myself everyday should be in the direction of what I want, I should put in the work, the time, the energy and triple the efforts. This is my vision and my dream, it is what I want for myself and I have to intentionally set myself up for success.
I have to make life more enjoyable for myself. I did not come on this Earth to pay bills and survive, I came here for enjoyment and enjoyment at its finest. I should plan great experiences for myself, pick out activities and execute them, regardless if it’s just me. I should be more intentional about having a grand time!
I know this blog post will come as a shock because who posts about their losses? Why not just pretend to have it all figured out, huh? Because I think it is important to know that behind this keyboard is a whole human being with feelings and emotions just like everybody else. That I too have terrible days and weeks. That we all have our uphill battles once in a while and it does so much good to just let it all out. I will be sure to update this post within the week, let you all know how I am doing with my blurry dreams and dimmed hopes.
Please, do not feel inclined to reach out to me. You can simply comment and that will suffice.
A gentle reminder from your blog auntie that we write our story everyday through the choices that we make.
Sometimes, life comes to a staggering halt for everyone, one day blends into the next and the vibrancy that comes with seeing a new day dies out. Life starts to feel monotonous and it seems to pass you by: the world is on fast forward and you have been on pause for the longest time. Routines are just that, routines, and you have fallen into a rut, you are on a treadmill going nowhere…fast.
Life becomes so hard to love, you are existing, you are surviving but you are not living, are you?
It is when we are in this pit that we stay longing for a touch of enchantment, awe or excitement that can breathe new life, hope or purpose into our weary souls; begging to be freed from the confines of familiarity, symphony of repetition and the predictability in our every day routine that casts a muted shadow on our once burning passions.
I wake up everyday and promise myself the world. That’s how I get through my days🤍
Here are not so cheesy ways in which you could fall in love with life and living…again.
Practice gratitude.
Being appreciative of the things you have now, right in front of you, allows you admiration for the present, those around you and the efforts you put in each day. It shifts your focus from what is lacking to what is abundant. Gratitude doesn’t have to centre around major shifts/changes, you can show gratitude for even the simplest of things.
Sometimes I hate this era of my life and sometimes good things happen and I am content. Always, I am grateful.
We live a huge portion of our lives caring for other people, their opinions and their feelings. We look after those around us, show them indispensable amounts of kindness and compassion, bare with them through their low points and forgive their errors, shortcomings and mistakes. Yet time and time again, we fail to afford ourselves the same grace to be human, the same patience in our growth , the same understanding in our mistakes. We all make mistakes, face setbacks, and experience moments of weakness (it is the human condition!). Rather than viewing these as failures or reasons for self-condemnation, we can continuously choose to see them as opportunities for learning and growth. I am not perfect, you are not perfect and no one expects you to be perfect. Forgive yourself, be kind to yourself, show some understanding for the person in the mirror who is doing their absolute best to give you everything you deserve!
No but this is by far my softest era. Thank you to the one that showed me my worth and made me realise that I need to appreciate and love myself more.✨
Make meaningful connections with people who adore you, embrace possibility and allow yourself to have outrageous dreams, savour life (spoil yourself, find beauty in the sound of rain or the way the wind feels on your skin), be your own cheerleader, be alone.sometimes, give your appearance the time of day and above all, wherever you are, only be there!
I laid down my tools a while back when I realised not everything needs fixing and not everybody needs saving.
Bless this mess because I am 67 shades over “fixing” myself and God forbid I ever go on any self discovery trip again.
— ️Ms. Myra Trudea Okumu (@myraokumu) May 19, 2022
And remember, any mistakes you commit through audacity are easily corrected with more audacity. God knows what you want and what you are pushing for. Surely, you will live to see those marvelous days!
I believe in myself so much. That is the one thing I carry with me throughout my days and endeavours.
Can’t we all agree that we have had enough of 2023? Restart the year or just jump to the next? Merry Christmas and Happy New Year? No? Okay. Atleast I tried.
Welcome to Myra’s goal getting year , what has she gotten other than disappointments, failed balance and/or trust issues?
No, I got none of that actually. What I have gotten is more blessings that I bargained for, more love, more friendship connections, more balance, and just more of everything I asked for. I can say, without any fear of contradiction, I am cruising softly.
Seeing as my vision board is coming to life and I have achieved more than half of the things I set out to do, I thought it would be nice to share progress and share my new, improved and revised vision board.
I was right to map out a physical manifestation of the things that I wanted because it did give me purpose to get up each day and strive to achieve those things. I could and can still see exactly what I want, those brightly colored dreams that never seen to dull and burn bright with passion! I have slacked on some of them and overdelivered on more, I simply remind myself that I am doing this for me: my fulfilment and my happiness. I would highly recommend setting up a vision board for everyone that has goals they want to reach and milestones they can measure their goals with.
What have I cancelled out so far and what have I added:
1. I have gained more YouTube subscribers!
I have celebrated this win so much, you would think I have been consistent in posting content (askies guys!). I have not been able to stick to my proposed schedule and that really shows on my almost videoless channel but I am really working on that. I am learning to remember to film things and writing down ideas and all that. If you have not yet subscribed, use this link to join the family! I am truly grateful to everyone that subscribed to my channel and all the support means a lot to me. Y’all are amazing!
2. More money! I am NOT rich please abeg (but may Allah(swt) grant me that privilege). I am just saying I am able to do the things I want to do when I want to do them, that is not something I could say a year ago and I am so grateful for that chance. I work a beautiful job with hardworking people, my business has been on hold due to unforeseen circumstances but I am here and I am giving myself the best of everything! The theme of my life is no wahala’rd, guys!
As for ChateauxMw, see all my loyal and beautiful customers soon with beautiful scrunchies, organic hair products and just more and better of everything!
3. Prioritsing my peace.
Ah yes, the goose that lays golden eggs: putting yourself first. I am here to testify that it pays off to be selfish with yourself: with your presence, with your space, with your time and with your energy. I cannot emphasize the absolute need to take care of yourself and to center your efforts in living a happy life, not the perfect one but a happy one. I will admit that one cannot be happy 100% of the time and sometimes, we are neither happy nor sad but living in moments and creating precious memories. My peace has been a focal point in my journey and has come with acceptance of situations.
I have become more accepting of life, more tolerant of people and their problematic views, more understanding of people’s choice and most of all, more patient with myself as I go through all the seasons that were meant for me. I have also accepted that not everyone will stick around through the said seasons and that is okay. It is okay and only right for other people to prioritise themselves and their peace away from me, I wish them well from a God-fearing distance.Change is tough and adapting to new things is tougher but I find that, more and more each day, there is nothing more serene, breathtaking and beautiful like learning to love yourself all over again!
4. Vlogging equipment!
I never understood why content creators had so many tripods until I launched by YouTube channel and that was my uhuh moment. Now, at my earliest convenience, you will find my googling the price of cameras, tripods, lighting equipment, microphones and I can not keep up with the prices! What a time to be alive, ladies and gentlemen. I have acquired a few things on the list and you can find a complete list of my vlogging equipment here.
Would I say I am more successful, more calm, more grateful, more soulful, more present and more personal? Yes, I am. I am everything I have worked to be and more. I am the things that have happen, continue to happen and are happening to and for me, a collection of priceless items. I have had my bad days, some I do not have the words for yet but it’s coming. I am sitting here at 00:02 on a Friday dawn writing this and pouring my heart and thoughts out and man, this is (almost) everything I wished for! I have problems like every other person but I get through them and life will forever go on for me.
Here is the new board, exempt of everything achieved, eager to tick more boxes:
My new board is mostly focused on giving me the softest life possible and yes, I will never stop manifesting more streams of income.More money, a book launch, a skincare routine, a knitting machine, what more could a girl ask for?
What was on your vision board that has been a big hooray! so far? Let me know in the comments!
We live and breathe words. …. It was books that made me feel that perhaps I was not completely alone. They could be honest with me, and I with them. Reading your words, what you wrote, how you were lonely sometimes and afraid, but always brave; the way you saw the world, its colors and textures and sounds, I felt–I felt the way you thought, hoped, felt, dreamt. I felt I was dreaming and thinking and feeling with you.
Writing has always been that one thing I have never lost passion for: that everlasting fire in my heart. I mean, yes I have gone months without writing because I can’t get past the idea phase, or times where all I can write is gibberish and the frustration results in writer’s block, but words and I have never parted ways.
Despite working 18 hour shifts and running a full time business, writing still is a big part of who I am (and what I will always be!) and what use is writing if I can’t share that joy with others? What purpose does a story serve if not to be told? To be passed down? To entertain, educate?
Writing has always been second nature to me, something I was not taught but self-learned from reading others, and publishing (a) book(s) has been a goal I haven’t been able to shake off. That expensive, time-consuming, heart-wrenching goal that lives rent free in my mind.
Reading Danielle Steele, Meg Cabot and Cecilia Ahern, my love for stories grew with each read and each mind-blowing ending. Being from a third world country, my reality is different. The hurdles to be faced are different but very much real and very much unavoidable. Here is what I am learning in trying to get my books out and on the market:
ISBN application
When I decided that I wanted my books available on the international market, the one thing I needed was an ISBN, an international book serial number, which I wasn’t sure I could get in Malawi. The internet said we had a national archives where I could get one but their digital footprint is non-existent (gruesome story for another day). Buying an ISBN was out of the question as one was being sold for close to $200 on some sites! Several Google searches later, I stumbled upon the Archives office in South Africa and ISBN application was free, all I had to do was send an email with my book information and of course, a copy of a hard copy once published. Was that it? No. They reply hours later that I can use the archives in Malawi and at this point, I feel I am out of luck because the system in this country would involve me kicking and screaming all the way.
Fortunately, I was able to locate them in Zomba and I got my 3 ISBNs at less than $7 and the condition that I send them copies.
Book Cover Design
A book cover is sometimes the difference between someone reading your book or putting it down. I don’t have this down to a science but I have picked up a book solely because the cover was appealing to look at. This isn’t to say I haven’t read good stories with horrible covers but hey, good covers are eye catchers.
Finding a good designer is imperative, someone who is good at their job but also listens to your wants. The final result should depend on you, just don’t get in their creative well in the process.
This part needs you to know your book specifications including book trim size, cover paper, paperback or hard copy. All those trifling details for your perfect book. If you have any questions, you can always email me or write that in the comment section.
Getting Quotes From Publishers
If your ultimate plan is to get your book into a paperback or a hard copy, you will obviously need some people to print your book into existence. Regular printing and book printing are very different things and should be treated as such. Do not carry your precious book to any company that has the words ‘print’ on their door! Find the companies you feel can do the job and ask if they do book printing. Here are some questions to ask:
Do you offer book printing services?
Any reference material on any books you have printed?
Can I get a quotation on a book with Xyz attributes?
How long does these process between submission and printing take?
For my books, I chose TAG graphix (former: IPPL printing and packaging) and they have been such wonderful help through everything. I really can’t wait to work with them in publishing my books this year! A link to their website: http://www.taggraphixmw.com/
Choosing Editors
You have written every word you could muster and you feel this is your best work. You have edited all you could and this looks likes the goose that will lay golden eggs. It’s not there yet. You need a fresh set of eyes and someone willing to tell you the cold hard truth. One should be ready for constructive criticism and be willing to learn and grow from it. Editors are there to cross out what shouldn’t be there and help you build on your story. Think of it as the final layer of much needed colour on your masterpiece, the whole thing is you but it needed a step back and a fresh set of eyes to add that zing! to it. I picked 3 editors, each with a passion for story telling and all willing to point me in the direction of much needed change in some areas. They also do have a lot of experience in storytelling and writing and let’s just say, my manuscripts will be hitting their desks soon.
I am not a seasoned writer (yet), I am just a young woman who loves to write and share her writings. I write from passion and from my love of telling a good story. When I do publish my books, that will be an absolute dream come true and I will be sharing my journey here and on my YouTube channel as I go along, bare with me.
I hope whoever reads this finds it helpful and is a dreamer just like me, a true lover of words.
Love,
The girl who dreams in colours yet to be discovered.
About the blog
Myra Trudea Okumu is a personal blog that documents an individual’s journey through different aspects of living. Don’t forget to follow me on:
My struggle with anxiety stems back a few years if I am being honest and I know for a fact, I can pinpoint the exact moment it all began. I have always been a person who tries to focus on the good in most situations and how it can be better, and I have lived the better part of my life optimistic. Something I feel I took for granted.
Yes, tough times were there but they never really lasted.
Cue 2020. The year of true reckoning.
A year were nothing seemed to go right and I was fighting from the moment ‘go!’. It was a terribly awful year filled with trials and tribulations that I won’t fill pages about here (a story for one of my books lol).
I guess most of us have been there. The nights that never end and seem to drag forever, a cloud that hovers above you from your waking moment to the very second your head hits the pillow and the never ending tunnel of darkness.
The first storm comes and you think it will pass as it always has, then another and another. The storms last longer, are more fierce, more destructive, and shake and drain you more.
Days turn into weeks, and weeks into months and the storms stay pouring, resting in your life like they were always meant to be there and they begin to feel…normal.
Rather than disappear like they always have (did), these storms are not passing through and it becomes harder to be brave.
Life started to seem scary. I had lost once when it meant the world to win and fear replaced optimism. Feelings of impending doom became my daily bread: fear of being wrong, fear of being rejected, fear of imposing, fear of not being enough, and the constant unsettling fear of losing again.
I am not ashamed to say that it took me a long time to acknowledge that I had a problem and an even longer time accepting that anxiety was running my life. I had resigned to being the backseat passenger of fear, finding it hard to get up in the morning and even harder convincing myself to just leave my room.
If you are waiting for a guide on how to cure anxiety or a secret something, I (unfortunately) do not have one but I can, however, share how I navigate around my fear:
1. Acknowledge your anxiety and try to find the root cause
2. Practice gratitude!
3. Daily affirmations. (Remind yourself that you are valuable, rare and extraordinary).
4. Journaling
5. Talk to someone or find what helps you calm down your thoughts.
6. Do things scared!
Our toughest battles are usually fought alone, when no one is watching.
Our weakest moments happen inside and away from prying eyes, locked in moments and memories that hold us hostage, praying for an escape, hoping against hope that one day you wake up grateful and actually…happy. That yes, life can be hard and deals everyone there own cards but you can’t help but wonder why your cards seem to want to drown you, and life at every turn threatens to submerge you in your woes.
People wake up everyday sad that they woke up and dread yet the beginning of another day. Their life looks like it is at a standstill, each day exactly like the same.
Rinse and repeat.
No progress for them yet the world seems to go on regardless. Never a moment of pause to let them breathe and get themselves together, to let them feel their emotions or a moment to map their lives: not knowing where they are and uncertain of where they are going and where they are going to end up.
We have friends and family silently fighting and trying to master battles that have no rules, no course, and sometimes, no visible ending. We have people around us struggling with battles we don’t see. Things they won’t talk about. Things they would rather not deal with. Things they would rather forget but replay in their heads like a broken record. You don’t have to know someone is in pain or struggling to be kind.
Check on your friends. Tell them how much of a good person they are and how you appreciate them.
“Hey, how are you doing? Really.”
“Mental health check. How are you?”
Then sit there and listen. They are sometimes carrying so much and a listening ear is all they need. I don’t have a cure or anything that would relatively help but let them know that you are there for them and they are not alone. Life is messy for everyone and it has no favorites.
That person you see smiling everyday? Probably cries themselves to sleep.
That friend with the happy pictures and seemingly amazing life? They could have had a traumatic childhood that haunts them to this day.
People lose jobs, friendships, family and the world around them crumbles and shakes yet they get up and brave each day. Be kind.
People suffered trauma as children. Shown too early the ugly snare of the world and the cruelty of it all. Be very kind.
People have been thrown out of their lives, stripped to humiliation and thrown onto the cold hard ground by those they thought would hold their hearts. Be exceptionally kind.
Kindness is humanity.
A smile from a stranger in the most trying times, an ear that listens, a heart that doesn’t judge, people that empathise, people that support and cheer for you, people that love you regardlesss of the mess you are, people that see greatness in you, a hand that holds you and holds your hand, a shoulder that lets you cry your sorrows away. That is Humanity.
But before you are kind to anyone else, be kind to yourself first.
To those that struggled and made it out, I am glad you did and I hope you choose yourself everyday.
To those amidst the troubling waters, Keep Rowing. Your lighthouse is not too far.
I will leave the light on.
Love,
A girl whose dreams sometimes dim but continue to be in colours yet to be discovered.
I am here in my bed at 11:34PM on this beautiful 18th January night, straight out of 16 hours of work, 4 deliveries and writing this blogpost. Sleep? No where in sight, just vibes and Inshallah! at this point in time.
This is not a rant, sorry to disappoint. This is yet another journey I am undertaking: Finding/creating balance in myself and my everyday life(activities). What do I mean by finding balance? What does a balanced life look like me? It’s easy to get lost in the chaos of everyday life and more so, as I try to balance every aspect of my life including myself. I used to find myself constantly overwhelmed with my workload, orders and writings, and overpowered by the urgent to get it all done at the same time, leading to fatigue and burnout.
Achieving work-life balance for me involves a complete recalibration of the way I do and handle things and my own expectations. It also means pressing the reset button on what I view as normal. A drastic but needed change in the way I handle the situations around me in a way that reflects my values and my intentions. Nurturing my heart, my mind and my well-being purposely, every single day.
I feel most people in the dilemma I am facing often lack presence in their own lives, like they are living in the third person and they are just existing. I am not in that stage, currently, but I do understand how devastating it may be (usually is) on one’s health and wellness, relationships, and others.
There is a thin line between work and life, and drawing/setting a boundary between the two is very important. That and realising and understanding that you cannot be productive all the time. I find it so hard to just relax and let my brain cool down for a couple of seconds: always rushing to the next item on my agenda and my mind is in a constant state of panic that I should be doing something, anything.
I understand I cannot set balance to my life in a single day and deadlines seem too intense and would further stress me, here are the ways I plan on achieving said balance with intentionality, creativity and tons of patience:
Habit #1: Time Management || Planning ahead
Time management seems like the most obvious thing and yes, planning what you are going to do is easy, problems start at execution. Last year, I tried my hardest to write to do lists every chance I got and that really worked out in my favour. It acted as a compass through my day and allowed me to manage different aspects of my life without overwhelming myself with the details of each task. Planning ahead of my day, allows me the luxury of me-time, I know what to do next, I am aware of my surrounding and conscious on the amounts of time I assign to each task.
2022 also brought with it the writing on my monthly “wins”. A reminder to myself on my bad days that it is not a bad life, something most of us forget when life troubles our waters and rocks our boat. I am carrying over these two habits into this new year and remain optimistic on the dazzling effect of balance this will have. Subscribe to my newsletter for a copy of my monthly wins sheet!
Habit #2: Setting boundaries || Managing other peoples expectations
Learning to say “no.” to people and I know it is not easy, especially when people have grown accustomed to depending on you for their every woe. They need something, they call you. They can’t get to something, they delegate it to you. I am in no way saying neglect your duties or don’t help around. In fact, overdeliver on your promises but take time to yourself, know when to rest, take a step back, reset, cool off, take time off, rewind and breathe. Allow yourself the luxury of meeting people at the level that you can, overexerting yourself will only lead to burnout and what use are you then?
As an employee, I do my job the way it’s laid out for me. I dot all the i’s and cross all the teas. My work balances.
As a creative and an entrepreneur, I lay out my own work in bursts that work for me and still allow me time to myself and my self care. Here, I set my own expectations, goals, milestones and progress indicators. I love my job and I love everything else about me outside of my job. What more can a girl ask for but balance between the two?
“If a man is called to be a street sweeper He should sweep streets even as Michelangelo painted, or Beethoven composed music, or Shakespeare wrote poetry. He should sweep streets so well That all the hosts of heaven and earth Will pause to say Here lived a great street sweeper Who did his job well.”
– Dr Martin Luther King Jr.
Habit #3: Personal time|| Health and wellness || hobbies
Personal time for me is just time away from productivity, a moment of quiet peace and serenity. It ranges from laying in my bed to aimlessly scrolling through social media as I am not a physical exercise person and find comfort in my blankets. I have, however, been missing meals and find myself losing weight. As a person who finds joy in cooking, it’s a shocker that I miss so many meals and will have to resort to either a weekly meal plan or an eating journal. Maybe then I can keep track of what goes into my stomach and the times that it does. I have never really been conscious about my weight but as jeans stop fitting and shirts become baggy, it’s a no brainer. My meal plan is available for download below:
My hobbies will sue me one of these days for misleading them into thinking I have time for them. They have suffered and blurred into background noise, more so with running these businesses around me. Crocheting has plummeted to an all time low and reading is just as scarce. I plan on gifting myself a knitting machine this first half of the year as I also plan on adulting 101. A bookshelf is long overdue and just so happens to sit very high on my “23 things to do in 2023” list (to be shared soon).I find solace in the fact that my writing hasn’t taken much of that hit and remains top priority in the hobbies section. A win is a win.
The launch dates of my two books can be found in the “Books by Myra” section and I do plan on collaborating with people on giveaways to several schools! I am shaking with excitement.
Finding balance, all in all, boils down to individual priorities, what you deem as important and worth your time. Tasks pile up and suddenly, you don’t know which way is north anymore and I am here to say in the voice of Nightbirde, “It’s okay if you are lost. We are all a little lost and it’s alright.” Existential crisis’ arise from lack of presence, direction and focus, something I plan on avoiding in every lifetime. I have a plan to follow, goals to tick and a vivid balanced life to live.
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Love,
A girl who dreams in colours yet to be discovered.
Myra Trudea Okumu 