Tag: productiveness

Letting go of perfect

May 15th, 2024

“Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind.”
Dr. Seuss

To: fellow perfectionist ponderers and imperfectly perfect pals!

There is no perfect life or person, no perfect world or love, no perfect smile or situation. There is simply nothing perfect.

Know this and know peace.

Seeking perfection is being a candle that’s burning out on both ends. It is detrimental and will prove to be your biggest enemy. Now, don’t get me wrong. Letting go of perfect doesn’t mean letting go of ambition or striving for excellence. It simply means accepting that life isn’t always going to go according to plan – and that’s okay. In fact, it’s more than okay – it’s liberating.

When you do the inner work (self reflection, meditation, mindfulness and practicing gratitude), you will create a beautiful life on the outside. It doesn’t mean that life will be perfect, it just means you will have the tools to navigate the twists and turns that it brings.

Don’t sabotage something that is meant for you because you think that you are not good enough. If it comes your way, it means it’s meant for you. They say that comparison is the thief of joy, and ain’t that the truth?

Personally, I have no attachment to being remembered as a “good person”. Should I pass on (which I will most certainly do), the only thing I want people to say is that she lived her truth, and yes, I do things that are deemed to be ‘good’, but my highest intention for self is to live a life that makes me happy.

My advice to you is, let go of whatever attachment you have to a label or role if it is causing you to behave in a way that does not serve you. ‘The good person’, ‘the strong one, ‘the perfect one’, ‘the understanding one’, ‘the non-confrontational one’; let it all go. You have carried this around with you for long enough.

Your best will never seem like it’s good enough, when you are giving it in an environment that does not allow you to thrive. And those toxic relationships/environments will never allow you to fully perceive yourself as good enough or worthy.

You have to unpack and heal the experiences that made you believe that you are not worthy. And yes, I have certain values that I live by. However, I am not held hostage or limited by people’s perception of me. Being myself is enough for me.

Doing well in life isn’t always about being perfect. It is also about how you handle some of the experiences life throws in your direction.

You were not given this life (by chance or otherwise) to be perfect, you were simpy called a live a full human life. The human experience is ever changing, it has highs, it has lows, sometimes you will not want to be a part of it, but joy will eventually come, it will call you from your corner, remember to answer when it does.

P.S. You do not have to be perfect to be loved, cared for, respected or appreciated.

With all my heart(still),

The dreamer.✨🤍
Quarter life crisis averted!

May 8th, 2024

Purpose is heartfelt, benevolent, and personally meaningful to you. It’s a state of being that you desire for yourself, yet you recognize its importance in the world, and you want it for others too.
Karen Whitten

The quarter-life crisis: that moment when I realized adulthood isn’t all it’s cracked up to be (the training wheels of life having been unceremoniously yanked away), and I was left wondering if I missed the memo on how to adult properly or I was just skipped in the circulation all together.

It was waking up one day and realizing that the plan I thought I had for my life was actually just a crumpled, beverage-stained napkin with some vague scribbles on it done by someone (me) who had no idea what they were doing.

For the first time in my life, I was faced with a list of existential questions that hit harder than that first shot of gin.

I was sitting in my house, surrounded by unfinished writings, endless unanswered emails, publishing quotations, unanalysed documents and bills, and wondering if that is what I actually signed up for. I was questioning every decision I had ever made – from my choice to pursue my career to your latest newspaper submission.

Social media did not help.

I would be scrolling through Instagram and LinkedIn and see people getting married, buying houses, going on vacation, living their (supposed) best lives, nailing every goal on my list and having babies, while I can barely remember to water my small garden (RIP, yellow peppers), drink water (sorry, babe) and the only thing I’ve managed to commit to is my Netflix (which my uncle pays for) and Spotify subscriptions.

I felt (infinitely) trapped, (divinely) uninspired and (comically) disillusioned.

I can’t believe it is a phase of life often dismissed as a myth or exaggerated melodrama and I brushed it off at first, attributing it to burnout or temporary dissatisfaction with the trajectory of my life.

I am a person that is blessed in more ways than one and that was why I felt that I had no reason to be struggling because these years are supposed to be fun and relatively easy. Your 20s (they say) are supposed to be filled with joy and excitement and discovering new things and yourself.

But things were falling apart all around me and I felt like I had made the discovery and lost it, somehow.

I felt disconnected from other people, and even though I knew I was spiralling, I approached the situation with a sense of apathy that made it difficult to find the motivation to change or try to make things better.

Even for the things I did (with so much struggle) manage to get done, I was not experiencing milestones, or achievements. More like just living through them or watching them in third person.

I forget to offer myself grace. I forget to forgive myself for my shortcomings and for all the things that do not make sense.

As a 22 year old living a full life, I am still figuring out what I like, want, and find fulfilling. It is cruel of me to think I am not doing enough when I am constantly trying to make and build a better life for me and the people I love.

I am allowed mistakes and options, so it’s OK to try things and decide that they are not right for me.

Comparison may be a natural tendency for most of us, but it can truly be the thief of joy. It’s hard not to look around and feel like perhaps everyone has their lives more together than you. Or they are luckier. Or life is unfair for not rewarding your efforts.

But we don’t have the same 24 hours and we can only do our very best. There will always be someone doing better.

“What do you want to be when you grow up?”

Me? A superstar!

I may already be grown up in some ways, but I probably have many decades of life and marvellous stories ahead. And that means I have time to carve new destiny paths and define what I want my life to look like. A loving husband, bestsellers, a garden, bottomless brunches, a luxurious life.

The key to surviving a quarter-life crisis (to all those currently wallowing in one) lies in being kind to yourself and being proactive. Best believe, they will feel like the worst days in the last decade but you will get through it.

Don’t beat yourself up because you aren’t where you thought you’d be, or because everyone seems to be doing so much better than you.

When you feel anxiety creeping up, try to slow down your thoughts.

Breathe. You are not Atlas, the weight of the world does not rest on your shoulders.

The world will not stop spinning because you stopped pushing it.

Pull out your list of goals and review it—this can help center you and remind you that you are indeed making progress.

Write down every small win to look back at on the seemingly endless days of self-battle.

Despite bumps in the road, you will survive this and make it out alive on the other side. You got this!

🤍⛅️

The girl who survived a quarter life crisis.
Life Audit 2023/24

February 16th, 2024

“What you focus on expands, and when you focus on the goodness in your life, you create more of it.”
Oprah Winfrey

Last year was all I envisioned and more and it’s all because I took the time to sit down and figure out what was and wasn’t working for me in my life, what I actually wanted (not what I was conditioned to believe I wanted), and built a MF plan around how to make it happen.

I did not have a 10/10 year but I was focused on making/building my dream life. My vision board manifested and mid-year, I had to go back to the drawing board and makes new goals!

While there is that rush to get everything done and to get your life to gather, remember you’ve got a whole lifetime to achieve your best life. All of the things DO NOT need to get done tomorrow, next week, or next year (although, if you’re anything like me, your brain will certainly try to convince you otherwise… That’s the road to overwhelm, frustration, burn out, and failure… don’t take it!)

Let’s get into my 2023 life audit, see what’s working and what can be improved:

Mental health

Rating: 3.5 out of 5.

The only reason my mental health did not make 5 stars is because I hit a wall at the end of last year. As devastating as that was, I managed to pick myself up and “rebuild” my safe spaces. I am doing fine, thank you!

Physical health

Rating: 4 out of 5.

Do you remember when I tried the gym? Yeah, that did not work out😂. Sigh. Otherwise, I am healthy (again, my physical health took a dive in December because of anemia. Yikes.)

Family

Rating: 4 out of 5.

My family is doing great and the problematic members stay being problematic. Overall, it’s great and I am not complaining at all. If I have learned anything in these past two years, it could literally be worse.

Hobbies and creativity

Rating: 3.5 out of 5.

I am writing, aren’t I? You can still catch me on The Weekend Nation’s Thoughts of a millennial column, still giving my best pointers and unsolicited advice to this life thing. My book is still undergoing the processes of publication but God can forbid we pass June without hitting the shelves.

I have a garden now, and grew some maize in my backyard! Planning on taking this garden thing slightly serious and having vegetables to gift people. Sounds silly but that’s the dream.

I also took up painting, and cocktail making. Good luck to me!

Learning and personal growth

Rating: 2.5 out of 5.

Duolingo has become friend and partner as I relearn French and also dabble in Swahili. I tried Arabic but I got so frustrated with myself that I just dropped it, I swear. My attention span does not allow for such stresses, y’know?

I need more certificates and I think a Masters would look great for me. Imagine, Myra Trudea Okumu BSc. MSc (hopefully phD).

Career

Rating: 2.5 out of 5.

Another New Year’s resolution is to take every aspect of being a Microbiologist seriously. Reading more journals, attending trainings and conferences, all that.

Did I mention how I find my field of study so interesting and fascinating? Yes, I do. And I want to advance in it, this degree has given enough. It’s time for bigger fish, don’t you think?

Business

Rating: 3 out of 5.

The plan for 2023/24 was to bring back srunchies and I am working on it! Promise! Everything else is doing great and we are expanding our reach to other fields/areas. Wish me some extra madness to convince myself I can have everything I want!💕

Adventure and travel

Rating: 0.5 out of 5.

I literally have nothing to tell you guys in this, sorry. I was home the whole time. I will do better in 2024, hopefully!

Home and environment

Rating: 2.5 out of 5.

Remember how I moved out and decided to be independent? I have news…it is everything it is professed to be and more! Does it get challenging? Yes, a lot. Would I have it any other way? Yes, with more money lol.

Still building my safe haven and paradise on Earth. The painting station, the bookshelf, the photo walls, all of it! A home tour in June on my YouTube channel? I would love to!

Finances

Rating: 2.5 out of 5.

Can we skip this?

I don’t want to talk about it. I am doing everything I can to reach a certain goal and until I do, I will refrain from this topic.

💕My level 10 life

My level 10 life means I have alot of good days, surrounded by the man I love and the people I love. I am making enough to live very comfortably in absolute luxury. In my level 10 life, I do what makes me happy.

Note: this is not how to manifest your level 10 life. Go into more detail and be very specific about everything you see yourself doing. What do you do on a daily? What are your hobbies and interests? How much are you earning? How often do you travel? Be very specific and set your lifestyle accordingly to lean towards that particular future.

Go big! Do not limit yourself or think anything is impossible!

“Ignore the glass ceiling and do your work. If you’re focusing on the glass ceiling, focusing on what you don’t have, focusing on the limitations, then you will be limited.”
Ava Duvernay

The key to an extraordinary life is dreaming big, not holding back or judging yourself for what you want or don’t want.

Don’t worry about how you’d go about making it happen. Just give yourself the space to get really clear on what your perfect year would entail.

Your goals and desires are going to evolve as you grow personally and professionally. Different seasons of life will call you to focus on different things.

Make sure the life audit isn’t something you do once and forget about. Revisit what you’ve written on a weekly basis to put you in the energy of achieving it. Go through the whole process again next year! See what’s changed, where you’ve seen the most improvement, and how your level 10 life is evolving.

💕💕💕

Love,

The biggest dreamer.
7 days of gratitude

February 6th, 2024

How often do you stop to appreciate the good things in your life? Like really affirm to yourself that bad days happen but it is not entirely a bad life?

The things that went well and beyond your expectations, the people who made you smile/laugh, or the food that tasted delicious?

It’s often those little insignificant things, the simple things, the funny things that slip right by and go unnoticed.

It can be all too easy to focus on what’s not going well in our days or life that we miss all the good stuff that’s right there in front of us.

I don't even know where to begin being thankful to God for making me. Exactly the way I am.

Gratitude.
— ️Ms. Myra Trudea Okumu (@myraokumu) April 13, 2022

Negative bias stops us from seeing the good stuff right in front of us, no matter how much good there is to be seen.

Gratitude isn’t about ignoring or avoiding your problems or challenges. It’s about giving you a more balanced perspective on life. Yes, bad things happen all the time but good things are surplus too!

Sometimes I hate this era of my life and sometimes good things happen and I am content. Always, I am grateful.
— ️Ms. Myra Trudea Okumu (@myraokumu) September 16, 2022

I am incredibly grateful for the ability to revisit memories and things for which I should feel thankful when I am feeling like the world is conspiring against me and I cannot deal with it anymore. I still cling to them. They manage to calm and move me.

Here is 5 things I am grateful for in 2024:

1. Mi familia

I do not appreciate my support system enough for all the supporting they do; all the lifting and uplifting. I wonder what it is like for them to have an overachiever for a daughter or granddaughter, the constant dramas and non-existent potential problems fuelled by anxiety. I am so grateful for my biggest believers and cheerleaders and this is the thank you for being the exceptional people you are.

Yes. I am nothing without their love.

My parents have never ever told me to stop writing and focus on school. They always trusted me to find my balance and I am immensely grateful for that.
— ️Ms. Myra Trudea Okumu (@myraokumu) August 3, 2022

2. Writing!

Whew! I would not survive this life, unfortunately. I rely so much on my writing to get me through every and all situations. I am grateful for the gift of stories, really.

I write about anything I can form a compound idea around, and that is how I have made it this far off. I grieve in my words, smile in my faceless characters and I have lived vicariously through my stories.

Writing chose me!

Recieving news about things I wrote down for myself has me speechless and grateful for chance.
— ️Ms. Myra Trudea Okumu (@myraokumu) January 20, 2023

3. Being a microbiologist!

I actually like my job, believe it. Above the fact that it keeps a roof over my head and puts food on the table, my job allows me a life. It is interesting too and requires a certain train of thought, and I cannot see myself in another profession that is not somehow related to microbiology. To think there was a times I had no idea what a microbiologist was or what they did!

You live, you learn.

4. My mistakes

I know that is a weird thing to say but I look at my past failures, poor decisions and mistakes with grace. I have learned so much from them and everyday, I continue to learn just how much they have shaped me as a person, a friend and as a partner.

Everything happens for a reason and no truer words have been spoken since. There are certain things that cannot be done no matter how hard we try. I am human, things go wrong and are thrown to chance. Failing is part of my human experience.

I am grateful for my previous shortcomings, they all led to the person I am now and boy am I thankful!

In May, I am betting on myself.
Let her grow, let her fail, let her try again.
— ️Ms. Myra Trudea Okumu (@myraokumu) April 27, 2022

5. The muse that is love

Much of the world revolves around the people and things we love, down to how to perceive the world.

Love has started and ended wars, fuelled revolutions and permanently altered the course of humanity.

Love swallows me whole.

And not just romantic love, no. Love for my passions no matter how short lived, for the way I see things, for friendships that become anchors, for this life that does not go beyond 100 and for little laughs I share with the people I love.

I love. Without restrictions, hesitation or fear, no matter how charged with punishment love is. There will always be room for love in my life.

And this comes from my recent realisation that no one is meant to do this life alone!❤️

No but this is by far my softest era. Thank you to the one that showed me my worth and made me realise that I need to appreciate and love myself more.✨
— ️Ms. Myra Trudea Okumu (@myraokumu) March 31, 2023

Make a habit of giving thanks for the good things you have in front of you , and the better things that are coming your way. It makes all the difference, I promise.

I am certainly proud of myself for how far I have come as a person, but I still know there is a lot of room for growth. What I have done so far is good and has served many purposes but I can always be better. So I pat myself on the back along the way, but I keep going, keep looking for spaces that foster and allow growth.

If you knew me back in the day, I’m proud to say that person doesn’t exist anymore.

Remember to give yourself credit for your non-material accomplishments, such as your character development, self-awareness and clarity, boundary-setting skills, and sense of self-acceptance, when you think back on what you wanted and what you have achieved.

I encourage people to write down the little things they are grateful for everyday. The small wins to look back on when life is if dealing you hard cards.
— ️Ms. Myra Trudea Okumu (@myraokumu) September 17, 2022

Manifestation tip🕯️🪔:

Express gratitude for what you want as though you already have it.

You can be thankful of certain aspects of your life and yet feel worn out, frustrated, let down, or any other sentiment. Gratitude as well as emotions can coexist; you don’t have any obligation to hide what you’re feeling in an effort to stay positive.

Beloved reader, have a great day!🤍 dont forget to subscribe!❤️

With Love,

✨The embodiment of multicoloured dreams✨
— ️Ms. Myra Trudea Okumu (@myraokumu) March 31, 2023
24 things for 2024

January 18th, 2024
Dedicated to Yewo Mzembe.

A new year is the symbol of hope, light, and hard-core determination to do great things. It’s the time of year when everyone strives to do better in life and of course, be delusional about how the year is going to go. Don’t worry, we support delusion here!

The best way to make this year all about growth and achievements is to set resolutions for yourself. Ask yourself, “The year is 2025, what did I do in 2024 that has got me here–the place you aspire be?”

By doing so, you hold yourself accountable. You also get motivated to see your goals through till the end.

While you might be all pumped up about making 2024 the best year of your life, it’d do you well to focus on your overall well-being. Self-care will never let you down, that is a promise.

The joys of January. New year, new possibilities. Everyone is bursting with productive energies, making plans, setting up challenges, and writing resolutions. If only this blissful state could survive the first couple of weeks back at school/work and the long, dark winter nights. But sometimes we lose track of the goals we set, the many amazing adventures we envisioned for the new year and quickly settle back into our everyday routines.

We may rediscover that ambitious and exciting list of New Year plans sometime in the summer, but those fresh energies are already gone, so the goals list goes back into the drawer. Been there, done that. And of course, it’s silly, as it’s never too late to change things.

For me, the best way to ensure that I do not lose sight of my goals, or of the things I want to do is planning, organizing, and constant tracking. Yes, while I do like spontaneity to some degree, it IS a quite low degree – I much, much prefer planning everything in advance when it comes to the major areas of life (at least the things I have power over).

My system is a mix of big dreams, budgets, bucket lists, yearly goals and monthly plans. Ask around, I plan ALOT and I make list upon list. It keeps me accountable and organized. I believe in gradual improvement and breaking your goals into actionable steps.

Habits are hard to step into and get used to.

Set a goal and then work backwards by listing the steps you should make towards the goal!

Helpful tips for setting actionable tasks:
- Make sure that every goal you set has actionable steps that you can know you are definitely taking.
- Also make sure that the goals are measurable. So you can see your progress and know if you have successfully completed the goal. It would not hurt to also set milestones between now and the end goal; not only are they going to motivate you but they are a sign of progress.
- Keep your monthly goals list visible so that you can have daily motivation and inspiration to keep working on them. If you can pin a printed version somewhere, extra points!
- Be realistic about the amount of time you really have in the month to complete your goals. Are they even goals that can be completed in a month or a year?
- Always be patient with yourself if you don’t hit a goal by it’s deadline. It’s so much better to have tried and missed than to have not tried at all.
- But also don’t underestimate yourself- you are capable of achieving incredible things!
Every last of the every month, go through your calendar/monthly goals/monthly to do list and cross out all the things you managed to do. Revisit your vision board, restrategize, make amends where necessary and plan your next month. Before you know it, you are actively crossing out so many things off your list and the year is progressing nicely!

Tip: You can use a binder or journal to keep track.

Love,

The biggest supporter of delusional dreaming.

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2024 life board

January 10th, 2024

I am INVESTING in myself this year in every possible way you can imagine! Let’s begin there and the rest of my ‘ridiculous’ plans will make sense.

It’s incredible how many of us forget to include ourselves on our list of priorities. Or, on a list of any kind for that matter. I made the 2023 list and stuck to it with my chest and I saw monumental changes in different aspects of my life, and it also allowed me to fine tune on all the things I missed out or overlooked.

I took a face-first nose-dive into this hard lesson this previous year.

Time was one of my favourite excuses.

You know, the good ole’: “I just have too much going on right now (which I did, by the way).” But, I recently made a pretty big 180 in my life and there is time aplenty when I schedule myself right.

The best and most important thing you can do for yourself is deciding what the vision you have for your life looks like. What does successful you do, what does she look like, what does her day encompass, what does she prioritise or love.

I have two vision boards set for this year and they may not look like much but to me, they are everything:

1. The first one is for new closet, new shoes, gym?, new car, more books, conferences, more accessories, more travel!

2. The second board is for more money, successful businesses, vlogging equipment, book launch, perfume collection, more projects, more water.

2023 was an amazing year for my vision board and I nailed most, if not all, of my goals. Because of that, I had to make a completely new board mid year and I have saved myself the trouble by making two from get-go.

Everything I have achieved, I want to maintain and multiply. Everything I started, I wanted to overdeliver and finish. Everything I want, I want more.

I truly believe in myself and my ability to make my dreams come true and to make my life easier and more beautiful and maybe, even happier. Dreams keep us alive and give us something to think about and look forward to, they are the hope that make this world worth experiencing.

I’m a big yearly goal setter, and all throughout the year I think about ways I want to challenge myself or grow in the following one – but every end of December and beginning of January, like clockwork, it’s like all those good ideas disappear from my brain and I can’t remember where lto start. 2023 changed that for me and I am simply carrying it forward.

Every now and the , I’m struck by the realization that life is extensive and I am still very young, and there are numerous wonderful experiences yet to unfold and be felt by me– from exploring new places and savoring diverse cuisines to meeting interesting people, embracing love, acquiring new skills, and reveling in hearty laughter.

It is always a fulfilling reminder, like a hug telling me to calm down and enjoy the moments. So much to look forward to, my loves🤍

How did your 2023 go? Have you already set goals for this year? Let me know in the comments!❤️

Love always,

The girl with delusions of grandeur!❤️‍🔥
Hello 2024!

January 7th, 2024

My 2023 ended rocky and 2024 is off to a not-so-good start, maybe I will talk about why my past two new years have been terrible later. I am not here to sulk over spilled tequila.

Personally, I think 2023 was wonderful aside from the rejections, hurdles, let downs and the multiple failed attempts at escaping poverty. I had a good time and I found myself taking my own advice which is something that I have always struggled with. I mastered the art of letting go, letting things flow and cleaning my own wounds (and eventually, healing in my own space and time). Last year is still not my biggest lesson but I did manage to snatch a few here and there (Lessons of 2023: Becoming).

What did I do in 2023 that made me happy? Here is the list:

❤️

-Newspaper columnist (Thoughts of a millenial)

–Started a writers program (Tapatsidwa Writing Program)

-finished my second book (After the clouds, the sun)
-new job
-moved into my own space
-got clients for that other thing
–got a puppy, Coh

-policies (funeral, life, etc)
-reopened and rebranded (www.ChateauxMw.company.site)
-planted a garden

-joined America Society of Microbiology
-many, many certifications
–donated blood

–Attended the second Research Dissemination Conference

I tried, guys. I did my best to make the most out of 2023 and I hope 2024 will be better, especially for my mental health that took a hit towards the end. I am tending to that and picking up everything I can to bring myself back to a state of normalcy. I feel so excited for 2024 and to me, it feels like a long awaited present (I am OG delulu).

My dreams still call me, I still pursue them and it is the only toxic relationship I will tolerate in this life.

Lots of love❤️‍🔥

The girl with dreams that require serious amounts of delusion.
Writing while working full time

November 27th, 2023

The notion that writers spend their days leisurely in pajamas, sipping lattes while joyfully typing away is a charming thought, but the reality is quite different.

In truth, many of us juggle full or part-time jobs alongside our writing endeavours. Making a sustainable living as an author is challenging, often requiring multiple books or a blockbuster debut — which is rare (although I do hope ‘Sinful Basket’ will be a hit).

Balancing writing with an eight-hour workday, not to mention family commitments, self-care, exercise, blogging, and travel, poses a considerable challenge. While it’s tempting to think, “I’ll fit in my writing whenever I can,” I’ve found that this mindset often relegates writing to the background.

Personally, I prioritize routine, strategically allocating time to maximize productivity and planning ahead to ensure optimal use of every moment.

#1 – PROTECT YOUR WRITING TIME.

Many find it odd and inconvenient that my workday extends beyond the typical end time. This occasionally leads to missing out on social events or opportunities. However, if I make my writing easily reschedulable, it could establish a precedent for frequent rescheduling.

#2 – SET GOALS AND DEADLINES.

Think of them as your new best friend and your worst enemy at the same time. They are so helpful to achieving your writing dreams because they allow accountability and tracking milestones.

I would advice writing them down and pasting them somewhere you can see them. These goals could be number of words per day, the type of content you would like to write on certain days or writing deadlines that you have, including submissions.

#3 – COMMIT!

It only takes 21 days to form a habit, but you gotta stick with it! I know it is hard breaking down old habits of procrastination, but having the right motivations and mindset will help tremendously! If you can track milestones, or have an accountability chart, you do that.

#4 – BUT DON’T BE TOO HARD ON YOURSELF.

Ultimately, things happens. Illness, work deadlines, dead computers, seasonal depression,just life. So give yourself a little grace – especially in the beginning – to adjust and do what’s best for your life. Writing is not a chore, it should be an extension of who you are.

Good luck to all the writers out there and you continue to bring stories into the light and make true your literary dreams!

With love,

The dreams that belong to the multi coloured girl🫀
Life Lately + 10 personal goals before 2024

November 22nd, 2023

I have been playing journalist lately, or columnist more like. I have been writing for The Weekend Nation, every weekend as the name stipulates and it has kept me…writing. Something I have been having a pretty hard time with even though it has always come so easily to me. I have had my ups and down like everyone else and I am currently still sorting through the mess that was the last four weeks but life has been great overall.

Like I said, the universe has a tendency of meeting me as far as I meet myself and even though that hasn’t been very far out, my cup has not run empty. I am still grateful for the opportunities that continue to arise and the challenges I move past; and for the opportunities I did not have the courage to face, tizakumanaso. It just wasn’t the right time for me.

What’s new? First, I am a dog mummy! Yes, I am having the time of my life adjusting to having someone to attend to; feed, bathe and take care of. He is so noisy and very energetic, and why is he always hungry? Nonetheless, the company has been good for your favourite bachelorette and the company goes by the name of Coh. (Please, don’t bother asking what it means and no, it is not short for Kondwani.)

I am back to content creation on my YouTube channel and I am dedicated to uploading videos weekly (fingers and toes crossed) . I have been actively working towards making videos and I am relearning the processes with feedback from all the viewers of course (eggs and omelettes). Please do subscribe! And I will see you every Sunday!

Myra’s YouTube Channel

I would have loved to do a life audit in this post but I will save you the hustle by making a separate post.

December is days away and I am scared that I will not be able to meet all my goals even though I have made such significant progress in all of them (or Atleast made steps towards them.) Anyways, that does not take away the fact that there are some short term goals that may correlate to the original goals that I can tick off before the big 2023 finals. Let us get into the personal goals before 2024:

1. Donate blood again.

2. Donate 90% of my closet (I have already sorted through my clothes and if you would like to donate yours too, send me an email myraokumu@gmail.com or comment below!)

3. Organise a sanitary products drive! (If you would like to a part of this, please let me know!)

4. Be patient and more appreciative of myself! (I deserve the soft and gentle side of myself)

5. Finish writing my book (Check out my last post, 18th November 2023).

6. Write weekly articles, blogs, stories and essays! (One piece a day keeps the thoughts away.)

7. Learn a new language with Duo Lingo (Settled on Swahili and Arabic)

8. Get a funeral policy!

9. Complete a 30 day challenge (could be anything right? Any suggestions?)

10. A solo staycation🧘🏾‍♀️

I was going for ‘more collaborations’ as one of my end goals but I have put a brake on that one for now. Instead of set goals, I have put more focus on creating systems that work towards the goal, if that makes any sense. Dividing my goals into tasks and setting milestones, eases up the pressure for me to reach the end and also allows for accountability along the way.

2023 has been…something, to say the least and this year has not turned out as I initially thought it would. Remember the beginning of the legacy, we are nearing the end of the beginning and I guess things can only get better from here.

I haven’t been okay, lately. I am one to admit my humanity in times like this because I do not have unrealistic expectations of myself. Good news, I am doing so much better and you will be seeing more of my writings now as I transition into a space that allows for me to breathe, live and focus on my well being. It has been lovely and therapeutic writing again, I absolutely missed this.

That is all I had to say, subscribe to my blog and my YouTube channel and let’s stay connected!

With all my love,

Just the girl.
Intentional Living

October 8th, 2023

I have had a terrible week and I really want to talk about it, why not blog about it?

It started with constant sadness and absent mindedness, the usual PMS symptoms but without the MS. I swear for a second there I thought I was going crazy and losing my mind. Please, don’t get me wrong. I have a lot of things to be thankful for, things to look forward to, and I am surrounded by people with good intentions and support system that never fails.

What more would a girl ask for, you would ask.

And the answer is “I don’t know.” I should be grateful for the amazing job I have, for the friends I have, for the love that surrounds me, for the support I get, for this life I have made for myself, for the chance I get everyday to be a better person, for the things that continuously align in my favour, and countless other things!

I am drowning in my own head at this point and it is safe to say, sanity has vacated the building and recommended me to the nearest shrink.

How do I break this cycle?

What am I doing wrong or different?

What is misaligning my life?

I usually have everything dotted and crossed, organised in files and written down. Right now, I don’t. I am free styling and it is going terribly.

I could cry, but that would mean dedicating time and effort to that and I am not in the mood.

(Takes a deep breath)

It escalated into isolation, brooding, and avoidance. I should have said something, sure, but how do you explain a problem that has no plausible explanation or cause? How do you say ‘I am not okay’ when everything is okay? Just how.

I am so tired of not being 100% in my own life. Of not showing up for myself and for people in the ways I ought to, and I am so tired of holding myself hostage in this situation. Simple, mundane tasks I can complete in minutes being dragged through days, lack of organisation and focus; all that is not me.

I am human, I am allowed bad days.

But I choose (from tomorrow, because today went to waste) to be intentional.

I choose to be intentional about doing right by myself and celebrating myself for being me. Not cause I have achieved something. I will remind myself that even on the days I do not do anything that is praiseworthy, I am still an incredible human with amazing potential and qualities.

I will not take love away from myself or deny myself good things because I did not live to a certain expectation. I will applaud myself for being present each day and show myself compassion on the days when nothing makes sense.

I have to be intentional about breaking some patterns that I have noticed in myself . The procrastination? In the bin. The lack of focus, the anxiety over mundane tasks, the lack of writing, the constant excuses, unnecessary distractions? All of it, everything goes in the dumpster or incinerator. Whichever one is more permanent.Nothing changes until I change. I have to choose to change.

I have to be Intentional about my goals and your vision or I will be manifesting and sabaweling forever. My intentions and my actions should align. The choices I make for myself everyday should be in the direction of what I want, I should put in the work, the time, the energy and triple the efforts. This is my vision and my dream, it is what I want for myself and I have to intentionally set myself up for success.

I have to make life more enjoyable for myself. I did not come on this Earth to pay bills and survive, I came here for enjoyment and enjoyment at its finest. I should plan great experiences for myself, pick out activities and execute them, regardless if it’s just me. I should be more intentional about having a grand time!

I know this blog post will come as a shock because who posts about their losses? Why not just pretend to have it all figured out, huh? Because I think it is important to know that behind this keyboard is a whole human being with feelings and emotions just like everybody else. That I too have terrible days and weeks. That we all have our uphill battles once in a while and it does so much good to just let it all out. I will be sure to update this post within the week, let you all know how I am doing with my blurry dreams and dimmed hopes.

Please, do not feel inclined to reach out to me. You can simply comment and that will suffice.

A gentle reminder from your blog auntie that we write our story everyday through the choices that we make.

Love,

the forever dreamer.💞